Lovers of the World Suggest, “Why not try Romance, instead?”

Carrie Hayes
4 min readDec 14, 2022

A defense of love….

The scrutiny! Oh, the analysis of two Hollywood superstars, photogenic, super rich, exlovers- the couple everyone loved to hate- finding one another and this time, tying the knot.

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I think it’s great. Their respective kids are young enough, too, that by seeing the pair married, the lesson is that one can make a commitment, formalize the arrangement and really give it a go. This time possibly forever.

And this is coming from someone who doesn’t even believe in marriage. But the lady in the picture above does, absolutely. So much so, that he’s husband #4…As for said husband, he appears so thoroughly exhausted by the ups and downs of his Hollywood career, that he seems only grateful and relieved beyond measure that someone of her extraordinary loveliness is willing to take him on.

It’s wonderful and mushy in all the yummy down to your toes kind of ways. It says, “Eff you, cynicism! We are in love! And we went to Vegas to get hitched to prove it! And now the kids are with us on the honeymoon, so take that.”

And, to top it off, she’s taking his name. Who knows, in a couple years, he may take hers, too. There’s nothing more there than being in love, I think. There’s no need to spout off in the New York Times about mysogny and the Supreme Court wretchedness. She loves the guy, and she’d like to have his name, too.

The first time I got married, I took my then husband’s name which had three syllables, whereas my last name had only the one. His last name started with a vowel, followed by an apostrophe and it felt so resonant and substantial. When we moved to a place where English wasn’t the first language, the sound of my then husband’s name, was as agreeable there as it is in English. My own name, when spoken, meant either Ouch, or Garlic. End of discussion.

But that was years ago. I’m married to somebody else now. The only people who know me by my current husband’s name are the dry cleaners and the electrician. But that works for me. Because any association with this man, my husband, no matter how banal, feels right. When it was time to get hitched, we did so because of health insurance complications. To say my feelings were mixed would be an understatement…

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Carrie Hayes

writes historical fiction and is the host of the podcast Angry Dead Women. linktr.ee/carriehayeswrites